What was I thinking?

   Honestly I don’t know what happened. A guy in my dorm was watching Clone Wars, and I voluntarily sat down and watched it with him. I must be masochistic or something. 

New design

So we (and by we I mean I) have a new design here at NoVacancies. Let’s face it the old one was an unmittigated disaster, namely because No Vacancy Guy uses it as well.

 As an added bonus the new theme is named contempt, which really summarizes everything the blog is about.

VANESSA!!!!

VAAAANNNEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is on

So I’m browsing Mr. No Vacancy‘s site – I keep my friends close and my enemies closer – and I stumble upon this intriguing little post.

Third time’s a charm, right?  I created View from the Pew and found it way too monotoneous.  Then my next attempt was misappropriately named “Writeguard“.  The name “Writeguard” was already writeguarded (or trademarked in non-Burkettian terminology that the rest of the world uses).  Silly me, I forgot to check the US Registry on that one.  So, after much thought and careful deliberation, the new and hopefully final handle is Vacant Conviction.

 Guess again dipshit, that domain will be mine! Good job on the writegaurd joke. Real Witty. Now you see why I don’t go to church.

All in all I consider this a limbering up exercise for the real struggle ahead of me. The battle for the one domain that can truely complete my artistic vision for this blog, for the one address that really speaks to me – Microsoft.com

What’s with the name?

I’ve always wanted to write a blog. Narcissist that I am, I assume the public cries out for ‘More Simon!’ And I am only too happy to oblige. This isn’t the first time I’ve tried to start a blog – the internet is littered with my ‘One-post wonders’ – and I can’t guarantee that it won’t be the last. I have an unfortunate tendency to get distracted.

All of this is an awkward segue into the main topic of this post – get used to it, it’ll only get worse. Why no vacancies? Well it seems I came too late to this blogging thing. All the good domain names were either taken or filtered. Sigh. iRock – gone; GoMe – taken; iFuckingRock and GoFuckMe – filtered. Growing desperate, I typed in ‘NoVacancies’, a subtle jab at the unfairness of life, the universe, and first-come first-serve domain registration. To my great surprise it was available.

Of course it dawned on me later that the REAL reason it was available was because the actual expression is ‘No Vacancy’. Yeah, I’m a moron. The fact that NoVacancy is taken by  this guy didn’t help to soothe my spirit. The public don’t want some evangelist “Detailing the deficit of postmodern thinking”; they want – no need – More Simon!